THE APPLICATION
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PART ONE
THE BASICS
* required fields
1/3
What is your real name?*
What is your alias?*
What is your mantra?*
What is your date of birth?*
MONTH
Jan
Feb
Mar
Apr
May
Jun
Jul
Aug
Sep
Oct
Nov
Dec
DAY
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
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15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
YEAR
1987
1986
1985
1984
1983
1982
1981
1980
1979
1978
1977
1976
1975
1974
1973
1972
1971
1970
1969
1968
1967
1966
1965
1964
1963
1962
1961
1960
1959
1958
1957
1956
1955
1954
1953
1952
1951
1950
1949
1948
1947
1946
1945
1944
1943
1942
1941
Where do you call home?*
STATE
AK
AL
AR
AZ
CA
CO
CT
DC
DE
FL
GA
HI
IA
ID
IL
IN
KS
KY
LA
MA
MD
ME
MI
MN
MO
MS
MT
NC
NE
ND
NH
NJ
NM
NV
NY
OH
OK
OR
PA
RI
SC
SD
TN
TX
UT
VA
VT
WA
WI
WV
WY
A good assistant is well equipped to handle any situation.
What personal effects are you sure to have with you at any given moment?
What is the most reliable way to contact you?
SEMAPHORE
CARRIER PIGEON
CLASSIFIED AD TITLED "FOR SALE: TRACTOR" IN THE MUMBAI DAILY REGISTER
MESSAGE ENCODED IN WHALE SONG
Exactly how did you chance upon this opportunity?*
ON STAYTHIRSTYMYFRIENDS.COM
ON DOSEQUIS.COM
ANOTHER WEBSITE? WHICH ONE:
A PERIODICAL MAGAZINE? WHICH ONE:
ONE OF OUR EVENTS?
BY SOME OTHER METHOD
Please enter your e-mail address, just in case.*
Please reenter your e-mail address, just in case.*
To keep your application secure, please enter a password of 6 or more memorable characters.*
Alert me to any developments regarding the Assistant Search
Keep me abreast of any news regarding my preferred beer, Dos Equis
Describe your current occupation.
I agree to the
Application Process
.
My friend, you seem to have failed to complete all required fields of this part of the application. I shall attribute this to a wealth of enthusiasm rather than a lack of thoroughness. You may have one more chance... one.
Sorry, my friend, but I am only accepting applications from those 25 years of age or older. Please see the
Application Process
for more information.
THE APPLICATION
THE APPLICATION 
